I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
You know it's a good Halloween party when a guy wearing a light-up sombrero offers you blow.
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
There's a fly in my room repeatedly throwing itself at my window, and I feel it's really symbolic of what I want to do with my future
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
Randomize
