Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
I literally just rubbed my stomach and told my liver to "hang in there baby"
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
So much Jack, so little girl.
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
Randomize