Don't you send me to vm
"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
Do you think I could convince a doctor that my uterus is poisoning me? It wouldn't technically be a lie. It does more harm than good.
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
Randomize
