hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
The real estate's complaint had the words "loud squealing at 2am" in it. Then I remembered that was me spoon feeding you guys old potato salad while you screeched like baby birds. Great night.
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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