Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
The power of my boobs compel you
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
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