we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
On the way home she put on a necklace with her name on it and wrote my name in sharpie across my chest so that in the morning we could avoid the awkward Idk who the fuck you are conversation. Best. Girl. Ever.
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
