I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
I'm mad at him and disappointed with you. It's like I put a bunch of effort into a PowerPoint of "what not to do with Zach" to show you and the first bullet point was "do not love him" and you're just disregarding all my effort and friendship.
I have to make mistakes myself to learn from them
FUCK YOU I AM MAKING A POWERPOINT
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
My roommate definitely just walked in on me playing the piano naked.
By piano you mean.....
Like literally a piano.
Ohhhh that's kind of embarrassing.
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
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