I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
I'm too hungover for some lady to talk to me about potatoes
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
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