Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
Last night I ate parmesan cheese straight out of the container while watching Chelsea Lately. Look at what happens to me when you leave.
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
