she kept yelling 'call me bella'
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
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