did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
she lunged for my junk like it was the cure for swine flu
The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
Have you ever realized how cool bread is? Like so many things taste good on it. Like its crazy to think that peanut butter and turkey can both taste good on the same thing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
they set my background as his mugshot to remind me "having a big penis won't be a valid excuse in a court room."
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
there is puke in my bra ... again
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