I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
I think the tooth fairy visited me last night... after I chipped my tooth n blacked out, I woke up to my purse filled with cocaine n sequins.
I just asked the bartender if I could get insurance on my drink in case I spilled it.
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
Xanax and an ambien. And wine. I'm just waiting for mouth to mouth from some hot EMT. Sort of like the slutty girls version of sleeping beauty
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
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