so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
I just sold a pizza for the ability to listen to spice girls.
She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
YOURE A FUCKING ADULT. DONT TELL ME ITS PAST YOUR BEDTIME WHEN I WANT TO GET ANOTHER COCKTAIL.
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
Randomize