It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
Randomize
