So baked. Thought the twigs on the sidewalk were caterpillars with the ability to harden in self defense. Had to pick one up to be sure.
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
I haven't been single on my birthday for 7 years. If you don't get me laid tonight, your best friend/wing woman status will be revoked.
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
Randomize