In honor of tonight, my penis will make an appearance
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
honestly performing my own hysterectomy would hurt less than my cramps right now.
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
Randomize
