I'm a grown ass woman and I'm sitting in bed eating pizza at 4:30 a.m. BFD, right?
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
Dude, they're still mid-coitus. Pretty sure running in to high five my roommate mid-thrust is a mood-breaker.
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My phone autocorrects "pooping" to "popping" and I'm like DO YOU EVEN KNOW ME??!
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
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