And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
Randomize
