Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
How's work?
Spinning.
You told her dad that you were gonna "superman that ho" I love the first impressions you make
Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
The adults are the big ones right?
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
Randomize
