Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
He asked if I was going to squirt out my bday candles. I'm glad the perversion doesn't stop for special occasions.
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
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