Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
I gave her the last ten dollars to my name and bitch comes back with a six pack of bud light and a pack of sour patch kids
Randomize
