I made out with a deaf person. Also I've been drunk 11 days in a row now.
so i was supposed to be to work at 8..but its 9:15 and im currently standing stoned in the middle of holiday...with a bag with three doughnuts, two redbulls, and a slim jim..
god i miss watching you do this...
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
Is there a hallmark card for "could you please slide the FUCK out of my DMs"....?
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
Randomize
