Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
Tell your broad to take a big shot of 'chill the fuck out' and put it on my tab.
yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
One of my students submitted a thesis proposal to find the exact correlation between desire for sexual intercourse and vaginal heat.
Tell me you accepted it! This is critical fucking research!
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
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