Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
Passed out on a playground for a while before trying to break into the elementary school. Erica thought her captain tasted like cat food, so she poured her bottle into her cat's dish and proceeded to eat it like cereal.
You win. Erica always eats cat food.
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
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