As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
There could not be a more unattractive person. She just told me her period was so bad that she got sick. I think my penis retracted and killed himself
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
Guess who woke up with a hangover this morning? The same person whose parents found out and woke her up by banging pots and pans with wooden spoons.
Boobs are out for the taking
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
Randomize
