I need to just get drunk and eat a pot pie.
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
His fridge was full of blocks of pepperjack cheese, and his pantry was stocked with huge jars of jellybeans. Even if I'd been drunk, I don't think I could've made that up.
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
Last night I was introduced as the Picasso of getting fucked up so I obviously had to live up to it by chugging long islands
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
Randomize
