Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
i just googled "what is oprah really like?" how do YOU think my night is going?
I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
Tonight's Jeopardy categories were "Star Trek, Action Figures, Dinner For One, In Need of a Date, Still Living With Mom & Dad, You Have No Life." Beginning to think my life is the Truman Show.
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
Currently using my kid's computer to charge my vibrator. #thisis30ish
I hope I didn’t eat too many edibles just now. I got shit to do today. Like make Jell-O shots and take a shower.
Randomize
