Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
Apparently I filled my purse with chicken nuggets and told my mom I was a "sexual squirrel."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
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