Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
When you went off to sleep with that guy that looked like a dirty Jesus and I asked why all you had to say "trying to keep Christ in Christmas" and left. The Vatican called, you're going to Hell.
You're going to find someone that you love very much and that loves you, and then you're gonna find an additional person that you literally can't stop staring at from across the room. I feel very confidently about that
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
I just got through airport security with 5 grams of weed in my back pocket. Either I deserve a metal or the government is slacking
So now your dad has seen my tits. You could have told me he was coming by to help paint.
I didn't think you'd be painting the kitchen topless.
I couldn't find a shirt I was willing to ruin.
Randomize
