It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
You think you're smart. You're pretending to be asleep to save yourself from my hormonal pms mood swings. Unfortunately that only works against bears.
He just pulled a Spanish chick using google translate!!!! We are at the bar and she speaks zero English. Hes a fucking magician!!!!!!
The fact that I can sew my leggings while intoxicated proves I'm a functioning alcoholic
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
Randomize