why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
Ten minute nap on a staircase honey badger don't care
I love you. Mom got to wasted at the wedding that she threw up on my shirt.
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize
