And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
I lost my phone so I put sticky notes all over my roommates body asking her to wake me up at 7:00 AM.
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
You just can't finish a sentence that starts with "I may have drunk peed in the bed" with "do you mind if I skip work and sleep here?" Anyways, yeah still drunk at work.
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
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