"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
No one figured out why I brought along the vibrating massager.
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
I'm giving you an age limit on the people you're allowed to hit on at steak n shake at 3 am. I can't see straight and I want a cheeseburger. You want dick. I'm sure we can't order at least one of those. But maybe.
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
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