Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
Great, now everyone thinks I've had giraffe semen in me
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
We were right in the middle of sex and all of a sudden his kids toy story action figure starts talking "I think the word your searching for is Space Ranger." A literal Buzz kill. It was equally creepy and hilarious.
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
Randomize
