Those balls look pretty dangerous.
i need to find a birthday card for her that tells her how happy i am that i can now legally bang her
fuck he's narrating my life in a british voice make him stop im way too fucking high for this
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
If I was gonna be at your campus for halloween weekend, I'd dress up as the masked horny fairy and give out condoms. I'm so thoughtful.
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
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