and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
Randomize
