Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
someone wrote "the short drunk lives here" on our door. i already have a reputation
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
I'm in that weird half-dead, half fucked-simultaneously-in-every-orifice-by-a-bus-and-it-wasn't-a-good-time state.
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
Randomize
