break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
Fell off bed. Face first. 10 stitches. huge scar on forehead. totally going to start telling ppl my parents died fighting Voldemort.
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
After I was arrested and in the back of the squad, she lit a cig. I politely stuck my head through the glass opening and asked for a drag. She instantly slammed my head back, blew smoke at me and shut the glass. My view on state trooper chicks is forever tainted.
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
I forgot wine drunk hurts
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