so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
Banjos are just sex machines. Like lights to moths, banjos are to hipster bitches.
not allowed to tweet this cos she's following me but i definitely just got head in a stairwell of the university of chicago. wanted you all to know.
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
Randomize
