so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
where are you?
sonic
Good. I hungoveredly cleaned your room. This is what being married is going to be like. I pick the condoms up off the floor and you bring home the hot dogs.
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
I wasn't going to drink tonight, but was reminded this is the anniversary of prohibition being repealed. If I don't, then I am against my profession of bartending and anti-American, right?
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
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