I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
Its Friday night, and I'm sitting at home watching are you smarter then a 5th grader, drinking vodka. I got every single question wrong. Clearly you see where I'm headed in life.
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
Randomize
