lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
She's like a pop up book from hell.
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
All I have done at work today is eat and try to get my coworker to tie me to his bed again
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
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