in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
I just called my mom 'Napoleon bronaparte'. I need to stop hanging out with you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
Was reaching for my vibrator this morning out of my nightstand and strained my neck muscle. I'm getting so old.
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