I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
Even my vagina gasped.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
is there a way to sugar-coat "shes in jail" when someone is texting me asking where their friend is?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
My mom just told me she would flash her tits to a cop to get me out of jail, and then we high-fived.
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
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