eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
Randomize
