I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
The cops high fived after they tackled you
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
Today has been hell. Also I saw a dead man's penis. It's safe to say I will be getting very drunk tonight.
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
Randomize
