Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
I'm sitting in front of the mirror eating cereal and pondering how my boobs got so big
Welcome to my life
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
Apparently I made a chicken patty, angrily took it out of the microwave, walked outside, and threw it over the balcony. #me
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
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