Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
Randomize
