They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
Randomize
