why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
There was a lot of him and a little penis
Please call me back as soon as your phone is charged, if you die tonight I don't want the last thing I said to you to be "I just farted a little"
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Randomize
